I believe that many of our problems can be averted if we would honestly seek to understand other people. I think many of today’s issues would go away if we weren’t so angry and ready to pounce on each other. I would like to believe that if people would stop talking so much, insisting on being heard, would stop and think before speaking, maybe, just maybe, they would hear what the other person is trying to communicate.
I tell you what I think. I think that today, many feel that they are more important than the other person. We have easily demonized each other, so we don’t have to listen to each other. We are bent on getting our point of view out there, that we don’t have time or patience to wait to hear the other person. For some, it’s like being on stage. The problem with the limelight is that we forget sometimes like it so much, we release all inhibitions.
Just think about this for a moment, every one of us ultimately wants to feel that we matter. We want to feel appreciated. I am God’s child. I am made in His image, and that makes me feel good about me. You, too, were made in His image. You are who you are, and that’s okay with Him. Disagreements happen because we have different experiences that we wish others would stop and try to see. When they don’t, we get frustrated. We want people to change to be like us and they won’t, so we get angry. We want people to hear us, and they don’t, so we get louder and
Stop arguing and start looking at each other as a child of God. I am God’s child, and so are you. I am made in His image, and so are you. You are who you are, and that’s okay with Him, but He loves me too. Disagreements happen because we have different experiences that we wish others would stop and try to see. When they don’t, we get frustrated. We want people to change to be like us and they won’t, so we get angry. We want people to hear us, and they don’t, so we get louder and more hostile. Ultimately we shut down any and all channels to communicate and to learn to appreciate each other’s ideas, thoughts, and their uniqueness.
When we refuse to change for someone else, when we then stand our ground, not willing to bend an inch to understand the other person, I think we lose.
The truth is, no one has to change anything You don’t have to change your views to match mine; nor do you have to change your way of thinking. You don’t have to change your looks to look like the runway models; you don’t have to change so that you have thousands of friends to be okay and you don’t have to be anywhere near perfect either. You are who you are, made in God’s image. However, don’t forget that the person you disagree with is also made in the image of God. Neither may act like they are, but they are. Their behavior may suggest differently, but God still loves both of them. God loves the entire world.
If we agree that there was only one perfect person that walked this earth, Jesus, maybe we can begin to accept that we are different from others and at the same time, we are just like all others, imperfect.
I can’t change how you see the world, but I will tell you that when the world looks at you, the extraordinary people see a unique person with qualities and attributes that only are given to you. If you say to me that there are those who don’t see you, I say, maybe they are not supposed to. God sees you. He made you. He loves you. You don’t have to accept Him, but He accepts you.
I pray that I will learn to accept others just like Jesus did. Don’t you?LaSharnda
Dr. LaSharnda Beckwith
Most days I am happy. I wake up thanking God for another day to be alive. I honestly don’t take my being here for granted. Over the last year, I have experienced close and personal losses and they made me consider my own mortality. There have been days that I sit back and say to myself, “God is still on the throne. Don’t lose heart.”
You see, even the best of us will encounter days that are frustrating and disappointing. We will encounter people who will count us out, not take us seriously, reject our dreams and goals and even tell us that we will never be something that we have always dreamed of becoming. That’s why we are hesitant to share our hopes and dreams with others; we are afraid of their judgment and rejection as this young lady was. As I said to her that day in my office, I will say the same to you. If you have dreams, go for them. It does not matter what other people think; it matters what you do. If you don’t go for it, you are saying that they are right about what they think of you. If you go for it and fail, you don’t have to be embarrassed, trust me, the next time you will do better. One thing is certain, if you don’t pursue what’s important to you, you can count on never getting it.
I haven’t been able to shake a particular song all week. In fact, the song has encapsulated me. Has that ever happened to you? A song is so strong that it just stays with you? This particular song was ringing in my ear, almost like a whisper, as I slept throughout the night. I woke up this morning and could still hear it. I went for my morning run, and yes, there it was again. When I returned home, I reminded myself to find that song on YouTube. I did and saved it, so when I got into my car, I could blast it. Well, when I got into my car, that’s exactly what I did.
You probably want the name of that song, don’t you? Well, okay, the song is titled “Waiting Here For You.” The words say the same, “Waiting here for you with our hands lifted high in praise. And it’s you, we adore, singing alleluia.” I guess when you read this line, you may have said the words are no big deal. Well, maybe not, but they were for me today.
Lately, I have felt unsettled. No, I didn’t say that I am not content; I said unsettled. There is a big difference. For days now I have felt this unsettling in me. I have been praying for a person for weeks now, so that may be the reason why. I moved last year and just experienced the 1 year anniversary of that, so maybe that’s why. I don’t really know. I just feel that way.
Turn off the music, turn off the television, put away your computer, put down your phone, sit quietly in His presence and open your heart and your ears. Stop thinking about what you have to do next and be fully present to hear why He has you where you are now. For the unbeliever, this is foolishness the Bible says, but to you who believe, you know what I am talking about. 1 Corinthians 2:14 says, “But the natural [unbelieving] man does not accept the things [the teachings and revelations] of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness [absurd and illogical] to him; and he is incapable of understanding them, because they are spiritually discerned and appreciated, [and he is unqualified to judge spiritual matters].”
I don’t know how anyone can go through life holding onto bitterness. Do you? I mean, I get ticked off with people too. I can understand getting angry, and I even understand not speaking to someone who has hurt you, but not talking to them forever? That’s nuts! You know why? Because the other person isn’t being affected, you are! At the end of the day, you do not hurt the person you are mad at in the least. Oh, I know you think you do. But you don’t.
Let me ask you a question. Do you ever get tired? Tired of recalling those negative experiences? Tired of remembering what someone did to you? I am not saying that you have to be naive and continue to be friends with them. I am saying that you can learn from the experience, move on and be a more positive, productive and happy person.
I love being the person who makes another person feel good about themselves. I like speaking words of encouragement to them and then watching them come alive. I know, probably more than most, just how powerful words can be.
Which are you? Are you an Encourager or a Discourager? You may not be comfortable with giving compliments, but you can still encourage others.
Each morning I rise around 4 am, actually it’s more like 340, to go to my quiet corner of the house to read my Bible, to pray and journal. Some mornings I feel half asleep and half awake, I pray “Lord, give me the strength” and I crawl out of bed and head to that place, turn on the table lamp and begin my daily ritual. I know, the word ritual, just doesn’t seem right when I write it either. That’s what some would say I do, a ritual. However, I’d like to call it a part of my daily discipline. I want the time I spend with God each day to be a natural part of what I do; you know? Like some just get out of bed and head straight to the coffee pot, I want to head straight to meet Jesus.
It’s another Mother’s day and many are celebrating moms. Others are grieving because their moms are no longer with them and then there are others, like me, who lost my mom at a young age many years ago. I miss both my mom and grandma, but I do not grieve anymore. I celebrate them.
I want to say to those who can celebrate, celebrate and be sensitive too. Mothers should be honored. I want to focus on the beauty of what moms, even the ones who have gone, left us.
It can be frustrating when you have to deal with people who tend to always underestimate you. I want to tell you that I totally get it. However, I want to offer an alternative to you. Don’t get frustrated or mad. Learn to smile within yourself when they do. Think of what they are doing but do so and laugh at them. You will gain much more positive energy than if you allow yourself to become angry. Look, isn’t it really funny? Yes, it is. So instead of letting them get to you, let them fuel you.
Those who are strategic and ultimately get what they want, make good out of a bad situation. They learn to discern when they are taking things personally and recalibrate because when they begin to see everything as personal, they tend to not think strategically. When you are not thinking of the other person’s next move, they get a leg up on you and they win. They don’t cause you to react; you cause you to react. Not cool.
I am an animated worshipper of Christ. Sometimes I can be in my car and feel the Spirit of God move on me and I raise my hands in praise. I have to be so careful when I am driving,though. Some days I can be sitting in my office listening to a praise song and can be overcome with joy! I feel the Spirit of God so strong at times that my emotions take over and I have to remind myself that I am at work. My eyes fill with tears for nothing more than I am in the presence of God.
There is one thing I know for certain, she would be the first to stretch out her hands to worship God no matter her circumstances. That is something I can rejoice about and so can her beautiful daughter and granddaughters. Their mom was a warrior, a fighter, and a bold Born-again Believer. In their sadness, that’s what I want them to remember. I want to think about how passionately she praised. I want them to think about how much she would want them to do the same. She would want us all to miss her, and we do, but she would want us to know that she is with Jesus and she is shouting and praising her way through heaven.
Dr. LaSharnda Beckwith 