This Year Can Be Different…

new_years_resolutions_listEvery year starts with lots of New Year’s resolutions.  In fact, all kinds of goals are set. Resolutions range from fitness to career to relationship goals.  Many begin the year with all good intentions but for some reason, not too long into the year, those resolutions begin to fade into the background as every day life issues begin to happen.  Before you know it, you are at the end of the year again, only to look around and find that none of those resolutions you intended to achieve during the year never got started.

Disappointment set in. Then you become discouraged and ask yourself why. Maybe you try to ignore that you didn’t even try after your initial resolution was made, so you get a little perturbed with yourself. You might even blame yourself for not being disciplined enough to ever master your resolutions.  Well, don’t beat yourself up because you can do better.  Yes, you can even if you have tried over and over again.  It’s never too late to start again. You should never stop trying because I truly believe that you will eventually get the right process in place that will work for you. That is, if you won’t quit.

However, I will tell you this; it takes more than making resolutions each year to actually achieve them. You have to put some strategy in place. You see, sometimes New Year’s resolutions do not work because they are not well thought out. They are just thoughts that haven’t been formulated to be achieved. When New Year’s resolutions are made, generally, the person making them are just picking something fun to do or they may be frustrated with some area of their lives, so out of frustration,  they pull these types of resolutions out of the air and then announce what they “hope” they can master in the new year. Because they haven’t put any thought to the actual resolution, it fizzles out along the way.  When no results are seen, frustration, maybe even anger or disillusionment sets in and then you begin to tell yourself that New Year’s resolutions never work anyway.  You are right. If they are handled haphazardly, they don’t.

So how to do you ensure that this year’s resolutions don’t turn out the way your previous ones have turned out? Do things differently this year.  Begin your year with pen and paper. Write down your goals, put timelines and actions that need to be taken in order to achieve them. If you do these small actions, you will have better results.

YOU-DONT-NEED-A-NEW-YEAR-TO-MAKE-ADon’t let this year be just another year of loose resolutions when it comes to the things you want to see happen for you this year. Write down your top 3-5 goals for the year. Think through them. Make sure your goals are SMART, which means specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, and time-based. If they are, you are off to a great start.

This year can be different and you can achieve your goals. I don’t care how many times you may have missed the mark before.  Don’t you dare stop trying. Like with anything, the more you try, the more you practice, the better you become.  You may not have been the best at achieving your resolutions in the past, but that doesn’t mean that you won’t eventually. Maybe, you simply need to change your process.

Are you ready to live the life you always dreamed of? Are you ready to do the work, be committed and never give up until you see the results you want to see? Well, that takes time, its takes real commitment, diligence and determination. Most of all, it takes you not listening to others or to your inner voice that may tell you that you failed before, why try now. I tell you why, because you want to be better and you want to do better. As long as you have the desire to do so, you can.

This year can be different, but you have to be different too. So get started the very first day and keep at it everyday for the rest of the year.  You are bound to see better results. Remember, I am rooting for you!

God bless you in the New Year and may He help you with your resolutions too.

Inspiration for It’s Your Life; Own It.

Beckwith photoI have been asked what inspired me to write, It’s Your Life; Own It. That’s easy to answer.  For years I have coached or counseled others, whether professionally or personally.   I have taught young students and mature students , undergraduate and graduate. I have led people in government, in non-profits and in for-profit companies. One thing that has remained constant and has transcended age, gender, race or socio-economic status is the tendency of people, including me, to blame others for not having the life they dreamed of having.

I am sure you have experienced frustration, and maybe even anger, when things just did not work out as you had hoped. I saw that trait in my self when I did not get the promotions I thought I deserved. I had every excuse that anyone could think of as to why others kept me from moving forward.  Year after year, I would blame someone else for why I didn’t get what I felt I deserved. One day I woke up. I said to myself, stop it! Whatever you want in life, go after it and stop blaming. If you get it, good, if you don’t, you tried.  Just stop blaming your life’s situation on others. If you do, you not only draw negativity to yourself, but you will have given others power over you.  It’s your life, not theirs. Own your choices; own your decisions; own your risks or your lack of taking risks. Whatever you decide to do, though, is all on you.

I experienced an epiphany that day and it dawned on me that it wasn’t just me blaming others for my life; it wasn’t just me making excuses. Heck, I had heard many people do the same.  So, I decided it was time to tell others, what I told myself that day.  That’s the story of how and why I was inspired to write this book.  I hope you gain something from the experiences that are shared in it.