The Power of Words…

December 17, 2017 ~ authorlasharnda ~ Leave a comment

wordshavepower How do words affect you? Are there words that immediately turn you off? They just rub you the wrong way? That’s how I feel about the word “businessman” being used in a meeting of any kind in the 21st century. I may be wrong, and I pray to not be so easily offended, but in a day and time like now, if you haven’t gotten it, you never will. Your words matter. They can be demeaning or empowering in the context of work. What’s worst is, I hear sexist words more in Christian settings than in others; why?

The truth is, I actually understand why, but my God, enough of living in the dark ages already. It is time to appreciate the subtleness of your words. To me, when a person, generally the person is male and holds a level of leadership, makes sexist phrases, first off, it seems ignorant. Those who do so seem oblivious to the fact that today, in 2017, there are lots of businesswomen. In fact, there are 32 women in CEO positions in Fortune 500 companies. The top 4 are at General Motors, IBM, Pepsico, and Lockheed Martin. Guess what? 2017 holds the record number of female CEOs in Fortune 500 companies! That says something.

So, why do I get up in a funk about the word “businessmen?” Because the term is sexist. It just is. The proper term that should be used is businessperson or business leader. Why? To work to get rid of stereotypes!

Okay, so I will get off my soapbox for now. Please be patient with me, but I do want to share with you why the word bothers me so much. When I hear the word being used, typically, the person using it has no idea how much they may be overlooking a businesswoman in the room. This woman in some cases may have far more business experience and a greater understanding of how to cast vision, develop strategy, set goals and use the emotional intelligence she has to build high-performing teams. She knows how to drive for bottom-line results just like the man. But when she is sitting in the room, with a bunch of men and every one of them have no problem with the presenter saying businessman and not correcting him, that is a problem.

sexism Recently, I was at a Christian conference focused on business leaders. The presenter was so refreshing. As he spoke, I listened carefully. What struck me about him was his sensitivity in making sure when he said the word businessmen, he also said businesswomen. He did this throughout his entire speech. Did he get my attention and my respect? You bet he did.

Words matter. Why? Words can empower or marginalize. I hate being marginalized. Maybe you don’t, but I do.

I feel it’s important to say something so that it does not continue. Now, this may not bother you, and that’s okay, but you know that I am bothered and now you may consider that there are probably others around you who are annoyed too. Don’t just excuse yourself and say, “They are too touchy, or they are too sensitive.” Just don’t. If I say something that may be bothering you, tell me. I would want someone to tell me so that I can stop doing it. If I care, I will stop. If I don’t care, I will make an excuse and continue with the same behavior.

Little things grow into big ones. Whether the issue is one that no one ever thought would be a big deal like, you know, sexual harassment? All the things that were said 20 years ago suddenly have come full circle. I bet some of the people affected look back and wish they had never said or did what they did, now careers are destroyed, reputations ruined and families are in turmoil.

If you are a Believer, the world should not set the standard of how you should behave, whether you are at work or at church, you are to set a tone of fairness, justice, and equality. I think Jesus would. When I read the Bible, I don’t see Jesus making distinctions between male and female (some will argue differently, and that’s okay).

Just remember the next time you are in a boardroom, a meeting, sitting on a committee, or in some kind of setting where men and women get to play, men and women are playing equally. They are both needed, and there is no environment where one is competent, and the other is not. Either can be capable just like either may not be capable. Your words, though, sends a message; what will your message be?

Remember, “Let us not love in word or tongue, but in deed and in truth” (1 John 3:18)

You Make Life Matter…

November 12, 2017 ~ authorlasharnda ~ Leave a comment

you make life matter I believe that many of our problems can be averted if we would honestly seek to understand other people. I think many of today’s issues would go away if we weren’t so angry and ready to pounce on each other. I would like to believe that if people would stop talking so much, insisting on being heard, would stop and think before speaking, maybe, just maybe, they would hear what the other person is trying to communicate.

I tell you what I think. I think that today, many feel that they are more important than the other person. We have easily demonized each other, so we don’t have to listen to each other. We are bent on getting our point of view out there, that we don’t have time or patience to wait to hear the other person. For some, it’s like being on stage. The problem with the limelight is that we forget sometimes like it so much, we release all inhibitions.

Just think about this for a moment, every one of us ultimately wants to feel that we matter. We want to feel appreciated. I am God’s child. I am made in His image, and that makes me feel good about me. You, too, were made in His image. You are who you are, and that’s okay with Him. Disagreements happen because we have different experiences that we wish others would stop and try to see. When they don’t, we get frustrated. We want people to change to be like us and they won’t, so we get angry. We want people to hear us, and they don’t, so we get louder and

Stop arguing and start looking at each other as a child of God. I am God’s child, and so are you. I am made in His image, and so are you. You are who you are, and that’s okay with Him, but He loves me too. Disagreements happen because we have different experiences that we wish others would stop and try to see. When they don’t, we get frustrated. We want people to change to be like us and they won’t, so we get angry. We want people to hear us, and they don’t, so we get louder and more hostile. Ultimately we shut down any and all channels to communicate and to learn to appreciate each other’s ideas, thoughts, and their uniqueness.

When we refuse to change for someone else, when we then stand our ground, not willing to bend an inch to understand the other person, I think we lose.

be the change The truth is, no one has to change anything You don’t have to change your views to match mine; nor do you have to change your way of thinking. You don’t have to change your looks to look like the runway models; you don’t have to change so that you have thousands of friends to be okay and you don’t have to be anywhere near perfect either. You are who you are, made in God’s image. However, don’t forget that the person you disagree with is also made in the image of God. Neither may act like they are, but they are. Their behavior may suggest differently, but God still loves both of them. God loves the entire world.

If we agree that there was only one perfect person that walked this earth, Jesus, maybe we can begin to accept that we are different from others and at the same time, we are just like all others, imperfect.

I can’t change how you see the world, but I will tell you that when the world looks at you, the extraordinary people see a unique person with qualities and attributes that only are given to you. If you say to me that there are those who don’t see you, I say, maybe they are not supposed to. God sees you. He made you. He loves you. You don’t have to accept Him, but He accepts you.

I pray that I will learn to accept others just like Jesus did. Don’t you?LaSharnda

Dr. LaSharnda Beckwith

When I am Weak…

September 20, 2017September 20, 2017 ~ authorlasharnda ~ Leave a comment

whenI am weak Most days I am happy. I wake up thanking God for another day to be alive. I honestly don’t take my being here for granted. Over the last year, I have experienced close and personal losses and they made me consider my own mortality. There have been days that I sit back and say to myself, “God is still on the throne. Don’t lose heart.”

Most of you know I run each morning. The other morning I was outside, pushing through my run, when I promise you, I heard the voice in my head say, “When I am weak, You are strong. ” For many of you, I don’t have to explain what was happening. Anyway, I kept running and I continued to hear that phrase. At one point, I said it out loud. I knew that I needed to say it to God.

I have thought about why that statement came to me. Perhaps I was supposed to share this with someone else. Not too long after that spiritual interchange, I spoke with a person who had contacted me and her actions suggested that she desperately needed to speak with me. I was on my way out of town, so I said to the person, “if you need to see me, you have to do it today because I fly out tomorrow.” The person made it a point to get over to see me too. As we sat down to catch up, all of a sudden in the midst of our conversation, I thought I saw her eyes tearing up. At first I tried to tell myself that I was imagining things, but after a few seconds, it became apparent that she was tearing up and finally crying. I walked over to her, gave her tissue and wrapped my arms around her. After more than an hour of conversation and her sharing some of her deepest frustrations and fears, we parted ways. As I walked towards her to say goodbye, I wrapped my arms around her again, but this time, I would not let her go without praying for her.

For days, I thought of this young woman. I left for my trip and thought about her on the plane. I got back home and thought of her again. As I recalled all that had happened between us the day she came to see me, the phrase “When I am weak, YOU are strong” came back to me.

I am strong You see, even the best of us will encounter days that are frustrating and disappointing. We will encounter people who will count us out, not take us seriously, reject our dreams and goals and even tell us that we will never be something that we have always dreamed of becoming. That’s why we are hesitant to share our hopes and dreams with others; we are afraid of their judgment and rejection as this young lady was. As I said to her that day in my office, I will say the same to you. If you have dreams, go for them. It does not matter what other people think; it matters what you do. If you don’t go for it, you are saying that they are right about what they think of you. If you go for it and fail, you don’t have to be embarrassed, trust me, the next time you will do better. One thing is certain, if you don’t pursue what’s important to you, you can count on never getting it.

Don’t let others rob you of what God has placed in your heart and mind. Don’t let them stop you from being what you want to be. When people say things that hurt you, remember, “when you are weak, He is strong.” He will carry your burdens and He will lift you up above the negativity, the fear and the doubters. Let the doubters doubt you, but don’t you dare doubt yourself or Him. He believes in you and so do I!

2 Corinthians 12: 9 says, “…But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”

Waiting For You..

August 27, 2017 ~ authorlasharnda ~ Leave a comment

waiting I haven’t been able to shake a particular song all week. In fact, the song has encapsulated me. Has that ever happened to you? A song is so strong that it just stays with you? This particular song was ringing in my ear, almost like a whisper, as I slept throughout the night. I woke up this morning and could still hear it. I went for my morning run, and yes, there it was again. When I returned home, I reminded myself to find that song on YouTube. I did and saved it, so when I got into my car, I could blast it. Well, when I got into my car, that’s exactly what I did.

I arrived at my office, played the song on my iPhone as I walked from the parking lot to my building. Once I got in the office, I played it again. The song just got to me; I kept lifting my hands to heaven, worshipping God. I had to get up and close the door to my office because I became so overwhelmed with emotion just listening to the words and focused on praising God.

lifted hands You probably want the name of that song, don’t you? Well, okay, the song is titled “Waiting Here For You.” The words say the same, “Waiting here for you with our hands lifted high in praise. And it’s you, we adore, singing alleluia.” I guess when you read this line, you may have said the words are no big deal. Well, maybe not, but they were for me today.

Why is this song getting so much of my attention today? Why am I getting so emotional when I sing the words? When I watch the singers sing? My God, what’s going on?

I tell you what I think. I believe the song activated my “Stop & Reflect” button. It brought me to a sacred place mentally, and I was able to be refreshed.

I don’t know about you, but I get busy, real busy. I am consumed with getting ready for school to start, travel schedules and speaking engagements. I am writing a prayer to say at Convocation this week also. As I began thinking of that prayer, my heart became full. Yeah, I know this is weird to some of you, but that’s okay. If you are my friend, you know that I can get this way when it comes to God. If you are not my friend, but you took the time to read this, thank you for reading it. I know that many do not believe in God. I know many of my friends are professional people and many of you are too “intellectual” to believe. I don’t care how intelligent you or I become, how many degrees we earn, or how many positions of influence we hold, I will always, always, give honor to God and make no excuses for my deep love for Him.

It is easy to rely on our own devices, our wit and cunning. It is easy to look to others to help us get the next contract, the next promotion, or whatever next thing there is to get. When we stop that and start believing that all things come from the Father; When we trust Him and show Him our love through our actions, that’s when our lives will change. The reason so many are downtrodden, pessimistic and negative, is because they haven’t learned how to look at God. When we learn to lift our hands in praise, physically or metaphorically, our minds will be transformed and so will our actions. We won’t take part in silly arguments or fights. We won’t belittle or defame others just because we disagree with them. I think we will change because He will change us.

I will happily wait for Him because I have noticed when I do, I gain a sense of calm. My worries and stressors become small in His presence. Lifting my hands seem to break the chains of stress and worry. He gives me peace that surpasses my intellect. He can do the same for you too. I will close this with a scripture for 1 Samuel. I hope you will think about how stressed David was, but also consider how David responded.

Moreover, David was greatly distressed because the people spoke of stoning him, for all the people were embittered, each one because of his sons and his daughters. But David strengthened himself in the LORD his God. 1 Samuel 30:6

It’s In the Quiet Times…

August 6, 2017August 6, 2017 ~ authorlasharnda ~ Leave a comment

Lately, I have felt unsettled. No, I didn’t say that I am not content; I said unsettled. There is a big difference. For days now I have felt this unsettling in me. I have been praying for a person for weeks now, so that may be the reason why. I moved last year and just experienced the 1 year anniversary of that, so maybe that’s why. I don’t really know. I just feel that way.

In the rush of everyday life, when we are busy moving here and there, working, socializing, and just living life, the noise of life can be overwhelming. In fact, if we aren’t careful, the sounds can drown out what we should be listening to.

That’s why quiet time is so important. We need to set aside time to contemplate, decompress and live quietly. At least that’s what I need. I do it each day; usually, early mornings with shorter times. Also, I do a bigger block of time each week just to sit quietly and think. Life can be busy and the important things can be easily missed in our rush to achieve the next thing. I will admit it, I can’t seem to sit still and be satisfied. If I am not working in my office, I am writing a book or an article or a blog. I do several things at once. I work on several emails to various people while I may be working on establishing some new program or I am setting up some kind of meeting, working some marketing strategy or coordinating some speaking engagement. It’s always something. I push hard to get things done each day, and I will admit, I don’t have patience with what I perceive as “excuses” for not doing something. You see, I can’t stop striving.

I have to give myself a break though. I know for a fact, God made me this way. He made me passionate, resilient, persistent and strong. As much as I appreciate the woman God has made me, I also know that I can turn my strengths into weaknesses. The same is true for you too. If you are always working, pushing, striving and achieving, do you have time to stop and enjoy the accomplishment? Do you stop and savor the moment in quiet solitude before you jump to begin again? These are a couple of the questions I have had to ask myself lately. You see if you have always been the kind of person who believed that doing proves your self-worth, you need to rethink that. You know who proves you are worth something? God. However, you won’t know it, if you never sit down and take the time to hear from Him.

quiet-the-mind-soul-will-speak-life-quotes-sayings-pictures Turn off the music, turn off the television, put away your computer, put down your phone, sit quietly in His presence and open your heart and your ears. Stop thinking about what you have to do next and be fully present to hear why He has you where you are now. For the unbeliever, this is foolishness the Bible says, but to you who believe, you know what I am talking about. 1 Corinthians 2:14 says, “But the natural [unbelieving] man does not accept the things [the teachings and revelations] of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness [absurd and illogical] to him; and he is incapable of understanding them, because they are spiritually discerned and appreciated, [and he is unqualified to judge spiritual matters].”

God needs your attention and your time. Not after you are exhausted but He needs to talk to you when you are alert and ready to hear. He may have been trying to get your attention for a while now. Has He?

I Don’t Want To Let It Go!

July 9, 2017 ~ authorlasharnda ~ Leave a comment

let go I don’t know how anyone can go through life holding onto bitterness. Do you? I mean, I get ticked off with people too. I can understand getting angry, and I even understand not speaking to someone who has hurt you, but not talking to them forever? That’s nuts! You know why? Because the other person isn’t being affected, you are! At the end of the day, you do not hurt the person you are mad at in the least. Oh, I know you think you do. But you don’t.

Let’s talk about “that person.” You know, the one for which you are holding your grudge. They have moved on. You are stuck. Why? The person who is holding the grudge (you) is the person hurting. No? Yes, you are. You are the one who continues to recall what the other person did to you. The one who did the hurting tends to forget and move on to the next thing. If they are narcissists, they are more focused on the attention they can get next rather than stuck watching you. If someone asked them why you don’t speak to them, most times than not, they just don’t care or remember. Hey, but you are the person who got hurt, you didn’t forget, did you? You probably remember the day, the hour of the day, and what you were wearing when it happened!

positive attitude Let me ask you a question. Do you ever get tired? Tired of recalling those negative experiences? Tired of remembering what someone did to you? I am not saying that you have to be naive and continue to be friends with them. I am saying that you can learn from the experience, move on and be a more positive, productive and happy person.

Do you prefer feeling angry? Do you like thinking dark thoughts? Of course not, those thoughts and feelings are negative and defeatist. When I find myself thinking about what someone has done to me, I tend to over think the situation. I play and replay it over and over in my mind. I sometimes have to talk myself out of thinking about the situation and that person. See how much wasted energy these kinds of thoughts bring? Change your way of thinking when you deal with these kinds of disappointments. Learn to flip that switch. You will feel better when you think positive.

Anyway, I am just trying to say this: You are a better person when you allow yourself to let go. The best “You” comes through and that “You” not only changes the person you are on the inside, but it also changes those around you too. Well, it may not change the person who wronged you, but Who cares? When you leave them behind and focus on what’s in front of you, the happy things, life will change.

Forget about things that will hold you down. Forget about people who will cause you to stumble. While you are focused on them, they are busy succeeding, and you are busy getting stuck. Remember, if you can’t forgive someone for the wrong they have done to you, you can’t expect anyone to forgive you for the wrong you have done either. “For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” Matthew 6:14-15.

Encourager or Discourager?

June 22, 2017 ~ authorlasharnda ~ 1 Comment

I love being the person who makes another person feel good about themselves. I like speaking words of encouragement to them and then watching them come alive. I know, probably more than most, just how powerful words can be.

The good thing about a person who likes to encourage is that they do it whether the other person needs it or not. They know how important it is to be sensitive to those with whom they interact.

I am sure I have mentioned before that I people watch. By people watching, I can tell immediately who the Encouragers are and who the Discouragers are. I want you to think about this. You know just as I do, the value that Encouragers bring. We know the traits they demonstrate; generally, they are happy, optimistic and positive people. We also know the Discouragers; they are just the opposite. Although they can be negative, pessimistic and unhappy, many times they display more subtle traits than that. In fact, you may not be able to really point to anything specific; you just feel it.

Discouragers may not ever say one discouraging or disparaging word, but what they can do is not acknowledge any good thing about you. They may be ones who withhold praise or stay quiet when someone else has something good to say about you. They don’t do or say anything to support you, although they claim to be your friend.

Encourage-1thessalonians Which are you? Are you an Encourager or a Discourager? You may not be comfortable with giving compliments, but you can still encourage others.

I believe one form of encouragement is seen in actions. We can “love” the way Jesus told us to do when He said to “love one another.” Life is hard and people are facing challenges every day. People we meet or those we interact with each day are facing things that we know nothing about. People are facing loss, whether in the form of a divorce or a loss through death. Others are going through the loss of a job, while others may be dealing with grave illnesses, addictions, family problems, work problems, foreclosures, or jail. These are real life issues and some will share while others will not. You may be the difference in whether they keep going or give up, in whether they succeed or fail. You don’t have to show sympathy–that’s not encouragement. What you should do is inspire another person with the courage they need to keep on going. No, you may not be comfortable speaking words of affirmation to others, but you can do other things to encourage those around you.

Be careful and watch the words you use with your children and grandchildren no matter how frustrated you might get with them. If you are upset, always tell them that you love them and then tell them why you may be disappointed. If you are frustrated with your spouse, do the same. If you have an obnoxious friend that might drive you nuts, pray for yourself and be intentional in praying for them. If you have a friend who seems to always achieve & get what they want, to include compliments, don’t begrudge them, encourage them to keep on achieving and thank God for their achievements and blessings. All of the good that you do in speaking well of and to others, will come back to you. In the end, God commands us to encourage one another. You want to obey Him, don’t you?

“Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.”

(1 Thessalonians 5:11)

Do You Remember?

June 3, 2017 ~ authorlasharnda ~ Leave a comment

memorylane Each morning I rise around 4 am, actually it’s more like 340, to go to my quiet corner of the house to read my Bible, to pray and journal. Some mornings I feel half asleep and half awake, I pray “Lord, give me the strength” and I crawl out of bed and head to that place, turn on the table lamp and begin my daily ritual. I know, the word ritual, just doesn’t seem right when I write it either. That’s what some would say I do, a ritual. However, I’d like to call it a part of my daily discipline. I want the time I spend with God each day to be a natural part of what I do; you know? Like some just get out of bed and head straight to the coffee pot, I want to head straight to meet Jesus.

I’d like to call it a part of my daily discipline. I want the time I spend with God each day to be a natural part of what I do; you know? Like some just get out of bed and head straight to the coffee pot, I want to head straight to meet Jesus. I won’t lie, some days I read the scriptures and tell God, “I got absolutely nothing out of that” and on other days, like this one, I can’t seem to put my Bible down.

This morning I was continuing my read of Isaiah when I came across a scripture that hit me like a ton of bricks. It hit me because it was a scripture I had memorized at a young age. The minute I began reading Isaiah 54:6, “We are, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us to our own way, and the Lord has laid upon Him the sins of us all.” I immediately remembered the scripture and stopped to think about it. Instead of dissecting it, I found myself going back looking for scriptures I learned years ago and seemingly never used them anymore. I went searching and writing them down as I found them. By the time I had finished with this little exercise, I had written down eight scriptures. I found myself mulling over each scripture and saying them to myself, affirming each scripture as I spoke them.

You may say, “so what?” I know, right? I have no idea why I became obsessed with doing that this morning. As I sat to write this blog, I did hear myself say, “do you remember?” Do I remember what? Is the question really, do I remember where God has brought me from? Yes! Do you? Do you ever sit back and think about where you are right now and where you were five years ago, ten years ago, 20 years ago or even longer than that? I sure do. I think about how blessed I am today. When I look back five years, I was recovering from an illness that made life look bleak. When I remember ten years ago, I had just evolved from a work situation that had me questioning my competence and my potential. When I recall 20 years ago, I had gone back to school to complete an MBA.

Do you ever sit back and think about where you are right now and where you were 5 years ago, 10 years ago, 20 years ago or even longer than that? I sure do. I think about how blessed I am today. When I look back 5 years, I was recovering from an illness that made life look bleak. When I remember 10 years ago, I had just evolved from a work situation that had me questioning my competence and my potential. When I recall 20 years ago, I had gone back to school to complete an MBA. Yes, I was shocked to realize that one too!

There is one thing that remained constant over the years, my faith. Through the ups and downs; through the joys and pain; and through the accomplishments and disappointments, the discipline of reading my Bible, remembering scripture, and drawing on it in times of happiness and in times of sadness, has sustained me. The joy of the Lord has truly been my strength.

Today, I have a wonderful life. In fact, when I think of my life in general, I have had a wonderfully blessed and abundant life. God has been good. I would have never imagined some of the things I have accomplished and lived. Not for a girl like me; that little girl from New York, whose mom died so young. The girl who was raised by Pentecostal grandparents in Georgia. Or the one who was not at all popular back in the day. The one who was not counted out, just never considered by anyone other than the people in the little church in Georgia. Her? Who would have thought this would be my life?

Anyway, don’t let anyone talk you out of living your dreams or doing what God has placed inside of you. That includes you not talking yourself out of it either. Also, you should think about starting the discipline of Bible reading and prayer each day too. I bet you will one day look back, remember, and be glad you did.

I will close with Isaiah 43:19, “See, I am doing a new thing, as it springs up, can you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.“

Celebrate Her!

May 14, 2017May 14, 2017 ~ authorlasharnda ~ Leave a comment

Mothers-Day-Picture1 It’s another Mother’s day and many are celebrating moms. Others are grieving because their moms are no longer with them and then there are others, like me, who lost my mom at a young age many years ago. I miss both my mom and grandma, but I do not grieve anymore. I celebrate them.

I was reading a post that made me think a lot about this holiday. The writer said something like, “please be sensitive when you all begin posting Mother’s day comments tomorrow, I lost my only child a couple of years ago.”

I don’t know the person who wrote that post, but it did touch me. As I contemplated what this woman had written, my mind did not go to my own mother, but to myself. I am the mother of one child too. I don’t want to focus on anything that would make me or you feel down. Some of you already feel that way, so for the lady who lost her only child, I am so sorry. I feel her pain.

moms I want to say to those who can celebrate, celebrate and be sensitive too. Mothers should be honored. I want to focus on the beauty of what moms, even the ones who have gone, left us.

I am a strong, determined woman. I am, because of the many women who decided to be a part of my life. The strength to stand and persevere came from watching my grandmother, aunt, great aunt and other women. My ability to think and solve problems came from watching them work through hard life issues. And the faith that I have, came from seeing them embrace their faith and hold to it in the toughest of times, trusting God to bring them through. I watched them believe and trust no matter what. I also watched them go through the loss of their own loved ones and evolve stronger, more determined. I learned that God would not give you more than you could bear and that all things worked out for good to those who loved God. I learned so much from these mother figures.

Some of you experienced loving and nurturing mothers; they were so special. Others may not have had the same experience. Some may think that because they had the perfect mothers, everyone did. That’s just not the case. We know from living on this earth, that there are mothers out there that may not have been all that they should have been. If your mother is here, great and God bless you. Honor her. If your mother has gone on, I am sorry and God bless you. If your mother was not the mother many celebrate, I am sorry and will tell you this, there is someone who will take the past hurts and disappointments and turn your ashes into something beautiful.

However, if your mother is here, great and God bless you. Honor her. If your mother has gone on, I am sorry and God bless you. If your mother was not the mother many celebrate, I am sorry and will tell you this, there is someone who will take the past hurts and disappointments and turn your ashes into something beautiful. Don’t let the past define your future. “Honor your father and mother (this is the first commandment with

“Honor your father and mother (this is the first commandment with promise)” (Ephesians 6:2). Have fun celebrating with her while you have her here. Don’t be depressed if she is gone, celebrate the times you shared with her. Think of the joy and laughter as well as the life lessons you learned from her. If you are still grieving due to a recent loss, I won’t say stop grieving, I will say, God will be a mother to the motherless. I know, He has been to me.

Happy Mother’s day!

You Got This….

April 21, 2017 ~ authorlasharnda ~ Leave a comment

underestimate me It can be frustrating when you have to deal with people who tend to always underestimate you. I want to tell you that I totally get it. However, I want to offer an alternative to you. Don’t get frustrated or mad. Learn to smile within yourself when they do. Think of what they are doing but do so and laugh at them. You will gain much more positive energy than if you allow yourself to become angry. Look, isn’t it really funny? Yes, it is. So instead of letting them get to you, let them fuel you.

I bring this up because of what I have noticed with some of my dear friends. Some are good at handling it when others underestimate them, while others are not so good at it. There are two kinds of people, those who act strategically and those who react irrationally. First of all, you may not even be aware that your reactions can come across to decision makers as irrational. If you tend to lash out by commenting or by displaying negative body postures, you only hurt yourself. So the best thing to do is learn more positive coping strategies to get better results the next time you may be challenged to do a job.

react Those who are strategic and ultimately get what they want, make good out of a bad situation. They learn to discern when they are taking things personally and recalibrate because when they begin to see everything as personal, they tend to not think strategically. When you are not thinking of the other person’s next move, they get a leg up on you and they win. They don’t cause you to react; you cause you to react. Not cool.

When you react, you do so out of pure emotion. Emotions range from frustration, anger, and even fear if you feel people are (a.) underestimating you or (b.) trying to take something from you. The most strategic thing you can do over deliver and show others that you have what it takes. You are smart.

In everything, think of your next move as if you are playing chess and try to remove your personal emotions out of the equation. I don’t care how hurt you feel, think above the pain and create your next move. Your next move may be to look for other opportunities elsewhere is you are continually marginalized. Don’t stay where you are being frustrated and feeling undervalued. I have seen many people hate where they are and don’t do anything about it except stay and complain. When they never move up, they stay where they are and continue to complain and become more and more bitter. I say, don’t stay anywhere where you feel undervalued. The first thing you need to do is to recreate yourself where you are, but if you can’t, move on, and find another place to start again if you need to.

I have seen many people hate where they are and don’t do anything about it except stay and complain. When they never move up, they stay where they are and continue to complain and become more and more bitter. I say, don’t stay anywhere where you feel undervalued. The first thing you need to do is to recreate yourself where you are, but if you can’t, move on, and find another place to start again if you need to. Too many times, we allow life’s situations define our destiny. Don’t let that happen.

Anyway, always remember, being strategic is about being proactive and irrationality is reactive. One gives you the advantage and the other does not. Oh! One more thing. In all things, pray and allow the Holy Spirit to lead you. Your part? Be all that God has created you to be. He did not create you to be second, third, or last. He created you with a uniqueness that no one else has but you and you can count of Him fulfilling His perfect will for you.