I ran in the rain this morning. Did I know that it was raining before I went out? Of course I did. I almost didn’t go because of it. I opened my garage door, looked to see if it was coming down really hard, stood there for a moment, closed the garage and went back into my house and sat in the living room waiting for the rain to subside. I sat there for a few minutes, maybe 5 or 10, hoping it would stop but it didn’t. I got up and went back to the garage, opened the door and looked at it again, but this time I decided to just go. So I ran.
I had to run this morning. During my devotional time, I thanked God for the rain. I told Him that He had put this love of the rain in me; I didn’t know why, but I feel deeply that He did. Also during my prayer time this morning, I remember asking God to cleansed me and revive in me a new spirit. I prayed for a washing of my mind. I asked Him to forgive anything in me that offended Him or anyone. Finally, I remember saying to Him to create in me a pure heart. (Psalm 51:10)
As I ran in the rain this morning, I could hear myself going back to what I journaled earlier. At one point I thought the rain was dying down, for a minute, it felt lighter. I smiled and thanked God for that. I stopped at a red light and as I stood there, I prayed again for a cleansing and a renewing of my mind.(Romans 12:2) All of a sudden, an outpour began. I laughed because I felt God was saying to me, “Here you are. Think of this as Me washing away the old; the old feelings, the old filth and creating you new this morning.” I accepted that right then and there.
You may not believe in God, Jesus or the Holy Spirit, but I do. One thing that is foundational in my faith, is the need to repent and ask for forgiveness. To realize that He is in charge and not me. When pride, ego, and self, or should I say, selfishness, gets ahead of my commitment to Him, I have to remember to step back and acknowledge that as sin too. Thinking of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, I become small (humble) as I stand in His presence. The Word of God says, “Humble yourselves before the Lord and He will lift you up.” James 4:10. So I pray for a more humble spirit and a clean heart.
Lord during this month of fasting, my He be exalted and we be humbled.
Most days I am happy. I wake up thanking God for another day to be alive. I honestly don’t take my being here for granted. Over the last year, I have experienced close and personal losses and they made me consider my own mortality. There have been days that I sit back and say to myself, “God is still on the throne. Don’t lose heart.”
You see, even the best of us will encounter days that are frustrating and disappointing. We will encounter people who will count us out, not take us seriously, reject our dreams and goals and even tell us that we will never be something that we have always dreamed of becoming. That’s why we are hesitant to share our hopes and dreams with others; we are afraid of their judgment and rejection as this young lady was. As I said to her that day in my office, I will say the same to you. If you have dreams, go for them. It does not matter what other people think; it matters what you do. If you don’t go for it, you are saying that they are right about what they think of you. If you go for it and fail, you don’t have to be embarrassed, trust me, the next time you will do better. One thing is certain, if you don’t pursue what’s important to you, you can count on never getting it.
I haven’t been able to shake a particular song all week. In fact, the song has encapsulated me. Has that ever happened to you? A song is so strong that it just stays with you? This particular song was ringing in my ear, almost like a whisper, as I slept throughout the night. I woke up this morning and could still hear it. I went for my morning run, and yes, there it was again. When I returned home, I reminded myself to find that song on YouTube. I did and saved it, so when I got into my car, I could blast it. Well, when I got into my car, that’s exactly what I did.
You probably want the name of that song, don’t you? Well, okay, the song is titled “Waiting Here For You.” The words say the same, “Waiting here for you with our hands lifted high in praise. And it’s you, we adore, singing alleluia.” I guess when you read this line, you may have said the words are no big deal. Well, maybe not, but they were for me today.
Dr. LaSharnda Beckwith 