What do I say about the last months? I say God may be shaking things up. At the least, He is allowing things to be shaken up. I think back at the end of 2019 and remember how uncertain things looked for me. I was thinking about changing jobs; quite frankly, I had enough of what I saw as dysfunction and my part in seeing people mistreated, devalued, and outright humiliated by others. I remember saying to my husband, I know I make a good amount of money, but I cannot continue to sit by and watch it. I am complicit.

One day the senior leaders met and, although a senior executive also, one associate said, “why do we allow this to happen? Why do we sit back and let it happen?” The person did not have a clue how much she said forced me into action. I had prayed repeatedly, asking God to change the heart of the person who created so much fear and uncertainty, but no answer. I can promise you that I prayed over the decisions being made for more than six months. Finally, at the beginning of the year, I had the opportunity to travel to Africa, and while gone, I again got to see things from a distance. Again, I just prayed. During the time I prayed, I also tried to offer reason and a more inclusive and rational approach to the situations I was witnessing. Then in February, things seemed to settle down, but on the first of March, they started up again. I recall it was right before my 38th wedding anniversary. I had enough and submitted my resignation; I did this approximately one week before all hell broke out and Bam! COVID-19 entered the scene and what would become a new way of living for months.
During the week I was home, I started seeking God more and spending early mornings in the backyard communing with Him. I remember the weight I felt lifted after I had taken the step to resign and trust God for the next thing. Within a week of that decision, I had at least three serious opportunities present itself to me. One of the three spoke to what I believe to be my purpose, but certainly, it was my passion. When I read about the organization and saw their mission, vision, and core values’ statements, I was overly excited and felt God was saying to me, “Didn’t I tell you to trust me? Didn’t I promise that I was going to give you the desires of your heart? Didn’t I tell you that what others meant for evil, I would turn it to your ?” All I could say was, Yes, Lord.
Out of the three opportunities, all invited me back for second interviews, and I had serious opportunities before me. The one that won is the one that I know God purposed and designed specifically for me.

God has been speaking to you about speaking up about some unjust situation, and you chose to remain quiet. Perhaps you have participated in systemic racism by using some stereotypes to keep others out of the club. Maybe you have not, however, you know people who make racial or religious comments (as I sat quietly and watch this happen at my previous organization) and laughed just about being included. Or you have spoken up but then experienced the wrath of the one holding power. You were labeled as not loyal or too sensitive or too whatever. Maybe, God has heard your prayers, and He has allowed a shake-up!
We wonder what has happened in the world. What has happened is a wakeup call. Regardless of what is happening, God has a plan for it all. COVID-19 stopped us dead in our busy tracks. George Floyd’s death, as tragic as it is, I believe God is still in control and has used it to wake up America and the world. If nothing else, perhaps we will stop and not just look at inequalities in society as someone else’s problem, but a challenge for all humankind.
Do I believe good will come out of all the chaos? I do. It is in times like these; God can be God. He shows us just how much He cares for the minor and major things that affect us all. It is in these times if we are interested, we can ask God to show us what He wants from us to do. If our hearts are dark, we can ask Him to change it. When our minds are closed, we can ask Him to open it. If we do not understand each other, we can seek to understand rather than to be understood. Whether we like it or not, there is an awakening happening throughout the world. We can choose to be a part of the solution or commit never to be a part of this world’s continued cycle. People are not the same. We see things differently because of different lived experiences.
At the organization I left, it was my choice due to misaligned values. Others saw and commented on the same things I saw but chose to stay. Who is right? I suppose it depends on how one rationalizes what one will accept or will not. I would venture to say that many of the people I left behind are good people, but I am a good person too. I see things differently than my counterparts. I say this also as I end this article in the face of a racially divided country and world.
For Believers, just know, Racism exists, and we will never agree that it does not. I will not remain quiet when I see injustices. Proverbs 31: 8-9 says, “Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves; ensure justice for those being crushed. Yes, speak up for the poor and helpless, and see that they get justice.”
“No one is born hating another person because of the color of his skin, or his background, or his religion. People must learn to hate, and if they can learn to hate, they can be taught to love.”—Nelson Mandela

During these times of isolation, it is so easy to fall into a state of sadness, depression, and maybe even anger. However, we can also choose to look for the lesson in our current situation and try to redirect our thoughts. Think about it, isn’t this the perfect time to see how we can help someone who may be feeling alone, feel loved? Isn’t it an ideal time to take our loneliness and turn it into a tool that can help ourselves and others? One means of doing that is through social media. What an excellent way to reach out to laugh, enjoy the jokes, the comments, the memes, and some of the silliest things people are coming up with just to connect and make life a little more bearable.
I am about to begin that next chapter. I am excited about what God is doing in my life. More than that, I am excited about what He will do in yours. I am not saying to be foolish. I am saying to take time to connect with God during these days of isolation. Reflect on His goodness so that you are not paralyzed with fear. Look back on where He has brought your from and what He has done in your past. Trust yourself too.
While I wait, I pray that my faith stays strong. I pray to shut out all the “experts” who are not experts, and I pray to take things seriously and also not to overreact.
control.” So I try very hard not to fear, but to trust. His Word says in John 14:18, “I will not leave you desolate: I will come unto you.” Deuteronomy 31:8 says, “He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” So, I remind myself the God is here right amid this uncertainty. He said He would be, so I will not fear. The scripture that really speaks to me during these times of uncertainty is found in Psalms 23:4, “Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me…” Feeding my mind with the Word of God rather than people reduces my anxiety.
better? What causes them to recognize their brokenness and say, I will not do that to others? What makes some so different in their approach to their brokenness than others? Is it that not everyone is able or capable of looking inward? Is it that it’s just hard to see how our actions affect others?
want to say hogwash! However, at my age, I can honestly say that many of my challenges have equipped me for greater things. I know, I know, you might say that I am only saying that because I haven’t faced what you are facing. That may be the case, but you never know what people go through. We don’t really share our deepest troubles on social media. At least I don’t.
I grew up believing in the supernatural. I believe to this day in the literal ability to hear from God. For many, this sounds weird and probably makes some of you feel that I am some kind of spiritual lunatic. I can assure you that I am not. Anyway, I will not pretend that I am not super spiritual, because I am.
If you have lived long enough, you have probably experienced rejection and disappointment with people you have trusted. You may recall being on top of the world one minute and deep in the depths of despair another. Because you have been treated so poorly, you may have questioned your own value and worth. Don’t!